395. Six Things I Want to Keep Knowing About Myself

Next up after Meaning and Purpose it is natural to zoom in, as far as it is possible, on what I have come to know about myself in 2017 that could be particularly relevant to keep in mind for the coming year.

Some of it is repetition, because it overlaps with other Uplifting Reflections. But if you can spot these, you can also spot what I know I have to pay special attention to:

  •  So money, miscast loyalty to others, and devotion to productivity methods that may work for others but not oneself. Those three agendas sucked out a lot of energy from the YA novel, until I shelved it.

  •  There is, in all matters, something about forcing things that rarely seem to work for me, unless it is a deadline in webdesign or such.
  •  I wonder if the goal for the rest of my life should not be to set larger and larger goals – about accomplishments and achievements? I mean, forget more power and influence or ratings or readers or fans or whatnot. Focus more on cultivating the feeling that there is always an inner surplus of faith and calm and peace, but also of a sense of beauty and excitement – about things big and small. It is hard to put into words, but perhaps it is a bit like the feeling you have when you have been at the beach all day long with family on a vacation and everything has gone well. You are calm and relaxed but you also have other sights and experiences you want to see. However, what is important it that your base on the beach, and in the holiday house perhaps – they are there. That sense of a base of calm and rejuvenation, from which you can venture out. I really can’t put it better than that right now. It doesn’t negate large external goals, like growing my company to have employees – from 10 to 1000, or such. But perhaps that focus on ‘cultivating the beach’ is what underlies it all. If I feel I am moved away from that, while building my company then I am building in the wrong way, at the wrong time or I should not build at all.
  •  But sometimes you have to go on an intuition, if you feel it strong enough. Even if there are many unanswered questions and will be for some time.
  •  Fear is an integral part of human life and it doesn’t matter that we are no longer living on the savanna looking over our shoulders all the time for saber tooth tigers. It doesn’t matter if we – as I do  – have a more or less comforting spiritual world view and accompanying experiences (or beliefs that we have had certain experiences that confirms this view). It doesn’t matter if we are generally endowed with a very strong psychic condition whether from nature or from training, as certain special troops in the military many have, for example. Fear is not something you eliminate from life. Even Jesus feared the cross. Joan of Arc feared the fire. We fear all the time. Fear is not something you eliminate from life. It is something you learn to live with in better and better ways. And fortunately, it is possible to do so and still have a good life.
  • So … just timing out and stopping to relax and have a cake. Is that really a cure for such gloominess? Sometimes, apparently, it can be.


Read more:

The advice in this post is a composite of post excerpts from Knowing Myself … from the last half of 2017, on The Blog.

Here you can also find direct links to the posts themselves and read them as part of a narrative about the ups and downs of trying to find meaning in, like, life and everything. …