Next up in my continuing reviews of previous posts for my first Mega Guide about Inner Power … are these two reflections from March/April last year …
From 113. For Life:
These past days I’ve been feeling stressed – too stressed, thoughts racing, even my movements too rapid. Like a film set to go at 1.25 instead of 1.00 speed. And that is 0.25 points too much. This Will Not Stand. The quality of my life is measured by how I experience it and I have to chose to experience it differently now. Before it gets too late all over again. A part of that decision is about saying no to certain experiences, out in the world. Another part is saying no to thoughts like racehorses in my inner world. But above all I have to take it seriously and not just let myself be cascaded away by outer and inner events. I have to stop. And start over. For my life.
From 118. This Is It:
So maybe this is odd, but I swear – it has made me feel more alive than what I have felt in a long time. Just thinking, talking and acting slower – much slower – than I usually do. This is how to do it. This is how to get that quality – that presence – that mindfulness – call it what you want. This is to get what I longed for, but didn’t know that I longed for until I felt really, really empty inside for months on end… And I have. But it is over now. I will keep this way of being here in the world up this time. This time I will be here – with every part of my self.
So if I am to do a Guide about Inner Power I will most likely base it on these experiences, as recounted in previous posts in this series:
The experiences I also call pillars or foundations of Inner Power. And there seems to be three of them – for me:
- The awareness and acceptance of how many more possibilities we have to feel “happy” and ‘at peace’ if we try to consciously change our experience of events, not events themselves all the time – and that this is possible and worthwhile. (Post 415.)
- That it makes no sense to have future goals that give you stress in the present. Unless we are talking about escaping a mental or physical life-death situation, then if achieving a goal gives you stress, either the goal is wrong – or your path towards the goal is wrong. (Post 416.)
- Controlling what goes into your mind, broadly speaking. (Post 417.)
The fourth pillar or principle should then be about controlling the manner in which you think. Or speed. As the tin says.
This may sound lame but I can’t stress enough (pun intended) how much it has helped me over time not only to control what I think about (what I let into my mind) and how I think about it (positively/negatively) but also … the speed. Not letting my thoughts race, in other words.
It has a profound effect on inner calmness and clarity and peace of trying to slow down your thoughts, like you were trying to use them to write a poem instead of just letting all thoughts be a buzz or a cascade that drags you along.
So. That. Is. It. About. That.
But I will go more in depth with this in the Guide, and upcoming posts in this research series.
All you need to know about why I am doing this and not a diary right now … can be read here.
But otherwise I hope you get something from this exploration. I intend to turn it into a Guide about a single topic, something I’ve long wanted and which I think The Blog needs.
If The Blog can’t be accessed in many different ways for many different needs then what worth is it?
P.S. See also:
It helps to slow down, though, in my thinking and doing. The slower pace makes me feel less stress and better able to make decisions. I just have to remember it.
I want to renew my vow to myself about making it my key priority to have a better life experience, regardless of circumstances – some of which I can control, others not so much. That makes it imperative that I prioritize this type of mindfulness that comes from, well, slower thinking. I also find that it is easier for me, as I have recounted before, to experience my thoughts especially as something I can only (and somewhat inadequately) describe as: “a scene with Patrick Steward in a Shakespeare-play reciting something profound.” (from 137. Kingdom of the Soul) Second, I want to reaffirm my dedication to use the full arsenal of my experience to change, well, my experiences so they become more deep, more beautiful, more empowering … or just better. Instead of letting my mind run on autopilot and think negatively, in dis-empowering ways or just fill itself with junk instead of focusing my precious spare time on something truly valuable.