Spent some days with some really hard and really unnecessary arguments with Char.
I realize now that since Jay came our relationship has been net drained, for all the wonders we have together with Jay and other things.
It is not in crisis as such, but it is skewed towards a crisis – so to speak. And if we are not careful.
Our propensity to become angry with each other has been and is still strong, over all sorts of things. Mostly irrelevant things.
So this will be the topic for the summer: How to heal.
Because we are not split yet – obviously. But we are hurt. In more ways than one.
I suspect we could ride it out on routine, love for Jay and dedication to him and to making at least every day work.
But why settle with that? Why not use the summer to really think about this – how we can get back on track, and with more – lots more – love for each other than we have been able to show and give in the recent year?
There is every reason to take this very seriously.
I think this could be the most important summer yet.