Spent the day trying to work, again, although I had promised to keep weekends off. It was not a good or efficient work-day, nor a good family day, then.
But I felt I had to give one last effort to do more on the live-talk about Real Robinson, because there had been so many interruptions during my ‘week off’ to do this very project.… Read more
Alone one whole evening with Jay for the first time and it went rather badly. He wouldn’t take the bottle, or even a small glass of milk from Char. Not without screaming his lungs out.
I stopped after a while and just let him sleep in the carriage until Char came home.… Read more
– of both light and darkness?
I am talking about Jay’s birth, of course.
Everything was going so well, we were so full of hope – and then: operating table, cesarean, trauma.
We have cried a lot about that, but fortunately we are doing well overall. And we are more and more able to take joy in the important things – that Jay did well and does well, even if the birth wasn’t what we had hoped or expected.… Read more
Thought for a brief moment of spending some more of the waiting time for our son with looking for new clients, since I know I’m going to have only about 3K USD left on my private credit account by the end of month.
Probably less since I will be spending on food, etc., and not working much in this period of becoming parents.… Read more
Another day waiting for Jay to be born, and with only one thing certain: It’s going to be 13 May at the latest. Char is too old for them to let her go more than a week beyond term, so the doctors will see to it that the process is started.… Read more
Got this idea today for a new product that I might develop in conjunction with my webdesign business, start to sell and actually earn on – without selling my time again. As in doing a particular podcast about some topics I think will interest my target audience and, well, sell them.… Read more
Writing this Sunday evening and thinking about summer.
This afternoon we just had a visit by sister-in-law+kids, and a lot of talk about kids, and about having them.
It got me thinking again about what it’s going to be like – during summer, when we’ve been up all night and Jay is ill or something.… Read more
Okay, Jay may come around any day now – and according to the doctors he is due 6 May. Which still means any day now. So what’s the status on how ready I feel for that?
It’s long overdue to make such a status, and I’ve been wanting to for some time.… Read more
What would I like to get out of ‘middle-age’?
… supposing that it is even true that ME exists for me? (I could die tomorrow, you know.)
But what would I like to get out of it?
What would I like to be?
Until now, I have mostly thought of what I left behind for good.… Read more
Another Rearrange Appartment-weekend.
I need to throw out or store books etc. from the old shelves so only about 30 per cent is left to fit on the new shelves we are going to put up.
In place of the old shelves there will be our new big cupboard with clothes for all of us.… Read more
I had difficulty sleeping in the early hours, as so often these days.
My mind was racing, feelings with echoes of anxiety throwing my focus around like a pinball – and very much away from sleep.
I think it’s a combination of old scars from the days when I was hospitalized perhaps further back, and natural nervousness about becoming a father – a major life change.… Read more