Reality set in today (for the nth time) as I tried to eke out work-hours while Char was away with Jay from the house, for as long as she could do it with her tenosynovitis and morale keeping up with autumn mist-rain.
I got about 4 hours, not all of them good.… Read more
I found this old piece that I wrote last year after hearing about another old music idol of mine dying. I felt like taking it up again, for no particular reason. Maybe except one: The feeling I get from re-reading it reminds me that I have to do better.
I want that feeling more.… Read more
Today is my 43rd birthday, and who would’ve thought I’d make it this far? Sure, I live in one of the safest, richest places in the world but the enemies haven’t come from without as much as within.
In 1999-2006 I was depressed on and off, culminating in rampant anxiety, obsessive thoughts and hospitalization in 2005.… Read more
I’ve been thinking about time. And how we think about time.
If I think that I have only ‘so many years left’ I am constantly preoccupied with what I have left – although I can never truly know. So … maybe I should not.
I mean, it may be a lot more than I think.… Read more
I had difficulty sleeping in the early hours, as so often these days.
My mind was racing, feelings with echoes of anxiety throwing my focus around like a pinball – and very much away from sleep.
I think it’s a combination of old scars from the days when I was hospitalized perhaps further back, and natural nervousness about becoming a father – a major life change.… Read more