I wanted so badly to watch television this weekend while I did the dishes. Anything to get buzz in my head and relax while I had some ‘free’ time, not taking care of Jay.
But I did not.
I promised myself that, aside from emergencies and The Blog, home-time is without Internet.… Read more
As I grow older and continually try to fix my life to become more happier overall, it looks to me more and more like the key to winning this ‘game’ is to focus only on one single day at a time.
Sure, you should have goals and all but my point is this:
If you primarily focus on coming out of each day with the best experience, all things accounted for, you allow yourself to become happier overall – over the course of an entire life.… Read more
After much too much consideration, I think I feel more strongly than ever now that I should just give up … this struggle to ever make money full time from any creative endeavor.
You know parts and bits if you’ve read. Why I am thinking again about this.
But it really feels like it gives me what I want right now to just do my best at making business full time as a webdesigner and then taking every possible moment of free time that I need this energy to do some of my creative projects.… Read more
Was thinking about what feels like it has been missing from our relationship, while we have been raising Jay for the first year, and what it would take to get it back.
I found that it wasn’t sex or our once-again-shelved plans to do a major website on Inca history (a mutual hobby).… Read more
I have a really fucking long list of things to day that could keep me from doing something I really love, things that are Very Important – from cleaning house to searching for customers.
But I don’t do them.
I do the other thing.
And I realize more and more that this is what I have to do in order to get time to do that other thing – which I love.… Read more
Written on 20 March this post is indicative of … problems. At least with regard to keeping up blogging, and blogging about something that is … good. Meaning valuable. Meaning something I can believe is good and valuable for others.
With regard to catching up on both The Blog and my life, so to speak, things are messy right now and I don’t really know where to begin.… Read more
I just stayed home and helped take care of Jay and carry him around, since Char’s hand, unfortunately, has not gotten better overall since all of this started back in, I think, October or September.
She was seeing a specialty doctor the other day and got an injection with some hormone-or-other that would help reduce the inflammation.… Read more
Like I wrote the other day:
… I am still only doing Hammer and Magic – art and illustration bits – in my spare-time when I need to relax. I am going to be deliberately and hopelessly “unprofessional” about how I work on this project, because I know from experience that … nothing else works, if I want to stay motivated under the circumstances of my life.
… Read more
I’m through summing up conclusions from last year’s reflections, but where next?
These day’s I’ve had a backlog of posts, not because the world went up in flames but just … because: Baby, work, family and all. And sometimes the need to forget my laser-focus and just zone out whenever I had an hour or two.… Read more
Char came home with Jay and they had had a good trip down south to the family, and the rest of the day was pretty much waiting and prepping for the other big trip this month – to my parents’.
Everything else is on standby, as expected.
I’ve been thinking about under what conditions a creative project equals stress, if I can’t work on it, like on a day like this.… Read more
I feel it is unrealistic to do comic book pages as a whole and maybe I am not even that interested in that – right now at least. Since Hammer and Magic is an illustrated story first and foremost, I think I should just … accept that and then do illustrations, 1-page, for each chapter – or for as many chapters as possible.… Read more
News is the same shit … what can you do about the world, except feel more and more outraged? Better to read it very briefly to see if anything really important has come up that affects you, or might, and then read some research or in-depth articles about an issue, such as a particular political issue.… Read more
A mostly very normal work-day and family-day, but something occurred to me that was perhaps not normal?
For years I’ve been trying to optimize methods to put less junk into my mind by habit, from negative thoughts to superfluous Internet-read-stuff, and I thought what if there was a Really Simple Method to do this?… Read more
Recently I’ve felt more and more often that I’m ‘losing myself’, and the worst part is that I cannot really feel what it is exactly I am losing. Because I don’t feel I have time to sit down and feel … that.
It should ring some alarm bells and it does.… Read more