The easy and yet difficult question is that of Stephen "7 Habits" Covey is to ask yourself what you want people to remember about you at your funeral. I like to imagine my spirit seeing my body and thinking back on what I achieved. And spending countless of hours with the 'B's - boners, buzz, breaking news and battleships (any kind of random entertainment) - that just won't hack it.
I'm not a puritan, that bears repeating. But the fact is that I badly want to draw more, now that I have thought and obsessed about this for years and I badly want to do better at business. I have already watched and read thousands of hours of porn, news, and entertainment. Oh, and good books, too - books that are important for your spirit and education and all that.
And I have 20 minutes every day to myself. After Jay starts daycare I might have an hour or two at best, because I still have to spend more time making money.
So those are facts.
They should make it easy to choose how to spend that time for some years in the future.
I'm learning that the hard way, all the time. I'm learning that there are no certainties. Only certain patterns. In business.
And one pattern is negotiation. And as I've said before: You've got to know your deal-breaker. Mine wasn't reached this time, but it was close because I felt insulted. But you can't get personal. You have to give it a try - the deal. Especially in my position.
Then you can always draw away, if it doesn't work. The trick is, as with Big Photographer Client Who Has A Small P, when to draw away. When to throw in the towel. When to walk away.
That is something I can only get better at learning. Here may be a new chance.
Or a good deal.
There seems to be a remarkably close relationship between what we sell, why we sell it and then to how we relate to people who help us sell.
Sometimes there are surprises, though, so take nothing for granted - esp. about other humans.
But be wary when its all about surface and big words and not so much about affecting others in positive ways.
So I suppose, after all that has gone before on this gig, I should feel bad that I did not slam the door, or had the courage change myself enough to slam that door earlier in our 'cooperation'. I mean, I should feel humiliated, shouldn't I?
But, honestly, I just feel kind of ...'whatever'.
Perhaps that is a sign I already have the courage. It doesn't matter that he acted first.
I already know his type (much like my former employer when I was in the health sector):
He is a man who deep down cares mostly if not exclusively about himself. You can give all sorts of reasons - my kid, my ability to make money with other clients, my health, etc.
He will try to make it seem like he cares and then he will make demands again, or shrug off any reasonable arguments from my side that he should not abuse my time. He has already done so on a number of occasions since February. So now I know what I am dealing with.
Including my own feelings, I guess. But that makes for a stronger ability to make choices in my favor.
respect or not for initiative and courage - I just don't resonate well with people who are only in it for the money.
So in a way I'm glad this prospective client called and made it clear he had wasted my time.
A good, positive strong mindset is what you need more than anything to make the best of your small business, including but not limited to, the web-part.
And I will make myself the first case for this new book.