Wouldn't it be more convincing and powerful and thus beneficial to the purpose of The Blog to go out and start showing it to the world at a turning point, when people can begin to believe that yes, this is not just a ludicrous ambition - it is actually starting to come true?
She is a sweet bright young thing and I'm sure she will move on to do great things, but she also says that she figures Eastern Europe has got "more culture" than Spain. A fact she will investigate on interrail while traveling 22 countries in 3 weeks.
So right there and then I don't mind too much having 18 years on her. Maybe I have something to show for them after all.
Movie money logic follows the same formula as our forlorn hopes for life, sometimes: That it stays the same and that we can relive success upon success and don't have to take risks or venture into new territory.
So that is the way to test if you are depressed, then: Ask yourself about any particular day, when nothing out of the ordinary happened, and what you feel about that day?
If you feel it must have been a black no-good day, then you have reason to seek out someone who can tell you otherwise.
If you can't tell yourself that it is otherwise, and believe in it.
Another definition of depression. And so even ordinary days can, if we let them, help us discover our darkest of trials. And overcome them.
Maybe it's bad that you have to buy mid-wife-sessions to talk you up and calm you, if you can't get this from friends who family who live nearby and have the experience (we have that but they don't live nearby). Maybe it's a topic for political discussion about priorities of a welfare state.
Maybe later. For now ... we enjoy the peace. And peace gives an opening for all the love to pour through unhindered. To Jay.
So I did write my 500 words - which eventually got to be 1198 because I was in a flow and no alarms sounded. And then I used my reflections about this little decision to blog about for about 15 minutes which is also the time, give or take, that I reckon I can use on The Blog each day in the foreseeable future.
And in a little moment I will shift to client work and then shopping for house. We need a good suitcase to bring to the hospital and I think there is a store in a shopping mall that has them (and opening hours) this Easter Friday, so I'm going to check that one out.
Otherwise I need some tools for my toolbox to fix the final parts of the cupboard we bought for our clothes and Jay's. And that store is open. Even today.
But before all of that, now you know what toolbox I used to fix today's priorities of time and energy, and why I didn't make something extraordinary out of it being an official holiday.
Whether or not it was the right tools I used we will see in time. But if not, there are others I can try. That's the good thing about tool-boxes. You just have to remember to keep them well-equipped.