639. What If Peace Was Right Now?

What if I did not seek to escape work anymore which was not fully my passion? What if I kept building my webdesign business so it was sustainable and then profitable, paid off debt and saved for the future with those funds?

What if I over the years invested diligent time in a more passionate type of work, which could be something like my Distant Mirror-project and then at least gave it a chance to supplant wholly or partially my income streams from other sources?

What if I accepted that this may never happen, if nothing else then because I don’t have time to invest in this serious, time-consuming project – to make it something in less than 10-20 years or more?

What if I stopped looking for the quick way out?

What if I accepted that it is okay that some parts of life aren’t so fun as other parts of life, esp. when it comes to making money?

What if I began to appreciate more that my other sources of money – webdesign and other types of work – have their advantages, too? Like interaction with real people – for whom you make a real difference? Maybe creeps as well sometimes, yes, but mostly good people – even if they don’t have a website or business that interest you. But want something good – to make something good?

What if I stopped paying people who promised a way out – easy or not – if only I followed their program?

What if I stopped paying people so they could have their passion business (which is about teaching others to have a passion business) and then paid more attention to making ALL of my life as passionate as possible, in every situation, in every moment?

Wouldn’t that give me what I seek right away?

A change of mind. A courage to be very normal and not spectacular.

A break with the crowd. No, not that crowd – the other crowd. The crowd that thinks it is better than the crowd.

What if?

Why not?

545. Waiting For

It would really be a great help, and steady a lot of things, if one of us got a steady, high-paid job – after years of uncertainty here. And now with Jay along.

So of course there is fear it won’t come anyway. Or ever.

But … perhaps that fear just has to be accepted. Lived with.

I mean, I can write all sorts of good things about how we are just going to press on if things don’t turn out as we hope.

But before that … how about just accepting the fear instead of fighting it?

It is not easy. But I will try. I think it actually helps.

544. Inner Space

I should be able, with that temp work in place, to just say: ‘Oh hell – I feel bad this morning. I have 2 hours. I don’t have to do anything but it down, relax and wait until I feel better’.

So no pushing for customer search or whatever.

Sure, then it will take longer to built up a ‘steady’ customer network. And all sorts of other things.

But again, I am simply too old to continue this trend of letting the future keep me hostage and not able to relax and … feel good about being here now. I’m going to do anything to not let that happen.

And then all sorts of goals that I know will indeed give me happiness once completed – they will have to wait a bit longer.

Because I am busy being happy right now.

255. Down Waiting

Everything just blew up this morning, our frustrations, my stress. So much for the podcast I actually managed to make yesterday for my product line about peace, joy etc.

After the initial waves, had lasted, though …  I just gave up. I think we both did. 

Sat and stared into the air, playing distractedly with Jay.

But it helped. Realizing you can’t really do anything but lie down and wait. Give up, in a sense.

After steam has blown, just wait for it to evaporate. Accept that things are going to be muddled and nothing will be perfect for a while.

If ever.

Then start rebuild, bit by bit.

142. How to Avoid A Mid-Life Crisis In About 10 Minutes Per Day

The very ACT of slowing down, and timing out, will leave us with that place in the movie where the brilliant businessman or the overworked janitor or famous fashionista or dedicated housewife takes a walk along the beach or in the woods and … is present.

…. In their own life.

… Dares to think about it all … good and bad.

Feels it. And maybe … make some changes when coming home. Going up on the hill and scout the horizon of life.